Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Smoking Ban Death Watch

The KC Guy was kind enough to compile a death watch list of bars that will be in trouble if the smoking ban eventually goes into effect. I may have in the past linked to Scoot Utopia's list of the same death watch, but, like Harry Doyle, I can't find it. So, I'm going to steal their idea and come up with a list of my own. One caveat, I'm leaving The Stables off my list because I think it was well on its way to closing anyway.

1. Zoo Bar - This is a great dive bar where young single people, the kind that would have been depicted in the movie "200 Cigarettes", go to smoke some butts before they smoke some butts.

2. The Brick - I'd like to think that The Brick can survive in a non-smoking environment, but I'm unsure. The fact that they have better than average food and are a safe distance away from the douches at the Power and Light could keep them safe, but it's just not very safe to smoke outside that far south on McGee.

3. River Market Brewery - I'm not sure I'll miss this place either, but every time I've been there in the past 2 years, I'm the only one who wasn't sucking down a heater.

4. The Quaff - Air with extra flavor flows out of this place like it does out of Spicoli's van.

5. The Peanut at 50th and Main - The chicken wings are going to kill off all The Peanut's regulars long before the cigarette smokers die. So if there aren't any smokers grabbing a drink, there won't be anyone left to frequent this place.

6. Charlie Hooper's - This great Brookside bar is a great place to go for those just out of college, single and not a full fledged douche. But, these are the types of people who are more likely to go somewhere they can smoke so they won't be able to go to Hooper's.

Great job KC, you have really enhanced the competitive position of corporate bars and state sponsored bars (Power and Light). I hope that all of these bars are replaced by mediocrities like the Fox & Hound and Chotchkie's and we can reminisce about the greatness of some air with flavor.


  1. I cannot believe the twin Cities tavern has not made any list! I believe that it's a requirement that you're a smoker to even get in the door.

  2. You should keep a running tab of closed bars with the combination of the P&L district opening in conjunction with the smoking ban. The P&L was going to have a negative affect on many places -- as was the smoking ban. Instituting the two together is going to hurt a lot of places. Paddy O'Quigleys is probably the first of several.

    The Cigar Box should be on this list. As should be the Majestic. I fear for both places.

    River Market Brewery can't blame the smoking ban...mediocre beer, crappy food and crappier service are the reasons for their demise.

  3. I honestly think The Zoo is safe. For a decade it was the only bar on McGee inside the loop, isolated from everything else and unknown to most, yet survived just off the business of a small group of hardcore regulars who go every day.

    Since the Sprint Center & P&L opened their business has skyrocketed and the bar that used to be empty around sundown is usually still open at 1am.

    The smoke level has dropped tremendously in there the past couple of months, I assume due to people thinking the ban was already in place.

    Even if business does drop off due to the ban, the owner of thee bar is an attorney who runs the bar as a hobby. He also owns the building the bar is in, so overhead is low.

    I do think Stables is doomed. They are the only bar downtown that is closed on Saturday which hurts their ability to generate new customers to replace any who may leave once the ban takes effect.

    And what about The Cigar Box? If you can't smoke in a place named that...???

  4. Scooter and The D, I limited my list to either places I frequent or places that I know something about. I have been to the Cigar Box once and Twin Cities Tavern never, so they didn't make my list. In the Cigar Box's case I was trying not to just copy off of Scooter's list, rather, I wanted to add value.

    Brent, I agree with you about the River Market Brewery, but I think they have figured out how to remain open with the 5 smokers that currently frequent the place. If they lose the smokers they will have to close, so I included them on the list.

  5. I enjoy beer, most bars, not so much. To be honest I have been to few if any bars and thought WOW WHAT AN ASSET TO THE CITY!

    It's a bar, whoop de doo.

    I'm a cheapass and a bad drinker so I prefer to get my bomb on at the homestead. They wont allow me to get naked and run around outside at any bar that I know of...

  6. Uhhhh... what about:

    The Cigar Box
    Jimmy's Jigger
    Corner Cocktails
    Waldo Bar and that place right up the block from it

  7. I guess Voting over Blogging would have been a better idea. Don't cry for me argentina....

  8. Wow, Anonymous, such a pithy clever comment! Pray tell, when did you learn that "voting" and "blogging" were proper nouns and required capitalization? Was it the same douche that taught you that voting was more powerful than publishing? Go back to school and talk to me when you've completed the eighth grade.